LOL! And you say you cannot turn a perfect topic into a hole with clown face in it?
We set goals. Most people screw off.
What I’ve found I have to do in most cases is drop my personal judgments when it comes to other people in social situations outside of work. I just stop judgment completely. Turns me into a pseudo ENTP. I just stop giving a damn about how I’m perceived, and I usually come across as egotistically in the process and full of myself. But when people sit down and actually have an intelligent conversation with me it usually dawns on them that I possess good judgment and I understand how I’m being perceived and that I’m just that confident. And then they either resent me or want to know how I do it.
I don’t set goals socially. At all. Lesson learned the hard way, my standards are too high and I still keep my ENT side but I go with the flow. Save the goalsetting expectation for individual and profession areas, not everyone else.