General info


To get the most of out people, interact with them how they want to be interacted with. Do not use this to manipulate for ill will.

If you make a plan, stick to it, monitor its effectiveness. Be consistent.

Always be skeptical, but stay neutral in your reasoning until you find the correct answer.



Good advice. I am great with all three, but I suppose that is just an ENTJ thing.


Thanks for the stuff,

However, what you're saying is a natural trait of an ENTJ, So, it'd seem common sense to us .

I'd appreciate advices and tips that would be useful to the type.

e.g when speaking with an introvert, count to 10 before replying or taking the turn into talking .

Why? in most cases the introvert didn't finish and he is collecting his ideas to go on, and you will be interrupting him/her .


Yep - I've learnt this the hard way.


when talking to sensing people, remember these
1) talk about the presence (not the past or future). Example whether, sports, news, holidays
2) Enjoy yourself, laugh!
3) Don't start philosophical topics, they'll get turned off and probably avoid you in the future
4) Listen more! Cause everything you say is not going to be interesting to them!

I know the techniques but I still don't know how to make friends i.e. create strong relationship with sensing types. Any tips are most welcomed!


I like this post; may be one of the best in this Forum, cause one of the main reasons we're here is to learn how develop ones self.

May be a tip is to offer and give help, and using their sensing skills as a help in realizing one theory .. maybe?


I find SPs and STs easier than others (hence, I have close ISTP friends).

Have found easy to interact with SPs when I switch off my conscious thinking, and just go with my gut/ instincts - e.g. they make the best partiers or thrill-seeking companions. They also tend to have a bag of tricks, which can be fun to learn.

I find ISTJs and ESTJs to generally be pretty sharp, but more interesting when discussing serious/ non-trivial subjects, not so much for goofing around with. ESTJs like talking about business, and generally seem to have a natural talent - lots to learn from them.

Yes, overall, its much easier to relate to NTs, which explains a lot of my friends/ some of my family. But I like variety and balance.




"To get the most of out people, interact with them how they want to be interacted with. Do not use this to manipulate for ill will."

I totally agree with this. My only problem is how to sound genuine. I see a lot of managers talking about how employees need to be managed in the way they want to be interacted with. However, I feel that most of these people don't come across genuinely. I'm still trying to find the balance between the way I address issues and they way people want me to address issues. Any suggestions on how to be genuine, authentic AND effective?! :slight_smile:


Yeah.. I have an issue with listening, paying attention to issues that I find boring, patience and tend to lose patience while around peole who don't know how to multitask.. and just might not.. "get it" and quickly!

I really need to work on my patience and listening skills.


How many philosophical conversations about the “presence” are you presently engaged in?


Well, I suggest that we should read the book: How to win friends and influence people ( Dale Carneige)
I think all types have things for us to learn and develope the sides that we are lack of that needed to have in some situations.


Yeah. That’s an awesome book, especially for NTs. It teaches you how to be an ENFP basically :smiley:


Why should not you be ENFP when socialising when it realy helps you. Dont you know ENFP is the best type in socialising ( they are master in interacting with others). Do you know that ENTJ is the type that has very low EI when comparing with other types?
Pls look at the report below, and do some analysing, you can see that NT is the most successful type, next is NF.( look at the what NT is lack of while NF has that makes them success per what the report says) … report.pdf


I wasn’t being sarcastic and I wasn’t implying that being in ENFP mode while socializing is bad. I don’t know how you misunderstood me? Must be the low EQ?

The book is awesome and ENFPs get tons of free rides in life just for being nice to people and smiling all the time.


Thank you for your confirmation. It makes things clear now. At least i have no more doubt.
BTW, I dont think that i have a low EQ as what you said. The thing is the “wording” is much different with the body language and intonation of the voice. I can tell exactly the person’s attitude i’m interacting with if i contact with him/her face to face or via phone ( thats why i always prefer a face to face or telephone talking more than writting).
In your case, i wasnt sure 100% that you were sacarstic on my constructive attitude, that’s why i still replied in a calmly way and let the questions open rather than an conclusion one. I can tell you honestly that i dont get any problem to say " fuck off, asshole" or a more educated attitude is just ignoring the person that i find not worth wasting my time talking to. So look at the post and you will see it.
Also, It’s really not a problem for me to say “im sorry” if i find that’s my fault. But because i always prefer not to do things that makes me say so. Therefore, to advoid it, i was carefully choosing the words to post the reply to you insteading of acting aggressively in anger (i find decisiveness is pretty good but aggressiveness is totally bad, especially with female).
So it’s very nice that you confirmed the positive attitute and made things clear- to be FRANK now , and no misunderstood :slight_smile:. And that’s what i appreciate most from ENTJs.
Nice to meet you and interact with you!


You must be using the techniques from the book now because there is no way a person can react negatively after this post :smiley:

I read the book a few months ago and it’s really useful but the biggest challenge is actually applying what is written there. If you manage to apply it all, great things will happen to you. Warren Buffet claims he owes his billions to this book and he actually has a diploma from Dale Carnegie in his office (or was it his home dunno) instead of his school diploma.

I love it when the author draws an analogy to dogs. This animal lives solely because of it’s positive and warm nature. A dog is always happy to see you. A dog gets food and shelter just for making others happy, it doesn’t have to do anything else in life.

I find it’s easy to apply it when you’re writing something but in real life when you know someone is wrong and just stupid it’s hard to be patient and polite and not get into an argument. You’re supposed to steer him politely into coming to your conclusion all by himself instead of going the usual route of saying why you’re right and he is wrong.


NT types should stick together;
INTP and INTJ will actually listen to our ENTJ opinions and theories, and ACTUALLY GIVES USEFUL FEEDBACK.
but, it’s best not to work in the same group because the P will procrastinate and the INTJ will just want to be in charge which is ANNOYING
BUT at least it beats working with FPs (ugh people going crazy while making the whole group distracted)
Sometimes, we have to suppress our leadership because of the environment, our the environment makes us lose chances
(Lots of people don’t like us because we are the “role model, dictator”, arrogant, self centered. I agree though)
:smiley: That’s all Ii have for now