Infj mates


I am starting to fall hard for an Infj guy that is courting me right now…

I did not see it coming nor did I ever picture myself with an Infj. Anyone have any experience? Positives? Negatives?


I’m an INF(p/j balanced) and I had an ENTJ love in the past. What I’ve noticed is that it came as a total surprise for him to be drawn to me. He said that there’s so much about me that he never knew he liked in a person. The ultimate thing is what we’ve learned from each other, something worth cherishing… however, this comes with it’s respective challenges as well, and it’s not always easy and accordingly as it may seem.

ENTJs and INFJs can get along in a conversation and throw around a lot of ideas to talk about… we usually cut the chase to a lot of small talk and chat about what really matters to us. Our perspectives are contrasting, and I notice that we often inspire one another, and admire each other for our efforts and zeal to do what is in our and everyone’s best interest. It makes a good team. However, there can be a slight conflict factor in terms of being stubborn. It may take some work for the ENTJ and INFJ to meet ends with their point of views and how to implement their goals and values. There is a lot of depth in both types that their values/goals mean a lot to them, and it’s common for them to think “I know best in this situation”. This can lead to quarrels as the ENTJ stands strongly by his/her agenda and will usually have a partner to complement them in the journey. INFJs tend toward a great deal of negotiating (including their feelings about things), so they’ll be a lot of but’s, but’s and but’s. How willing and patient will the ENTJ be? On the other hand, if the INFJ gets too clingy by expecting the ENTJ to understand where the INFJ is coming from and how much their opinions make sense to them that somehow it can be shared and implemented, how patient can the INFJ be as well, and how much are they willing to be a little bit more independent? I think if both types learn to meet ends, they can make a wonderful team. Both have potential to learn a lot from each other.


You might find this interesting: ENTJ INFJ compatibility


I LOVE the part about INTJ+INFJ friendships. It describes my relationship with my best friend very well. She helps me keep in touch with my often overlooked emotions and is very good at advising me in things I’m not good at (occasionally being too bold etc.) She is also very understanding of me and “gets” me. I can be myself around her and know I’m not going to hurt her feelings. =)


Doesn’t sound like she’s an INFJ then.


My partner is an INFJ.

It’s the most intense, confusing, loving, crazy, safe, happy relationship I’ve been in, but I sometimes have these doubts, and wonder when is the other shoe going to drop?

One thing I’ve noticed is that often when we are in conflict, he will become upset when we are not in consensus about a matter whereas I feel energised by conflict because I see it as unravelling a situation that leads to clarity. I think I tend to feel better after a confrontation, whereas he doesn’t and sees it as a potential problem.

Fe is my weakest function, and it’s one of his strengths. I love a good debate, he loves harmony.