Last spot...


Fuck off!


And now you are denying it… You have failed me wasabi… And now you are running away like a rabbit. A little little rabbit… I eat rabbits. And I am going to eat you up my little prey… Because I am hunger, and make a fine dinner. I love you sweet ums.


I said, fuck off!


Why don’t you fuck off… You are just a waste of space. Sigh… My mother just spitted some more nonsense at me when I was eating… Now my stomach hurts… In any case, wasabi… Grow the fuck up!


It seems my stomach is rather slow… Sheesh… I have been playing some games, but I have little focus on anything. Sooner or later, I will have to put an end to this catastrophe. It is unlikely I will get better in the meantime. Just a bunch of idiots given me bullshit. I do not need it. I am well aware of myself, and need no advice. I am completely sure that things will resolve themselves in time, but in the meantime it is easier to stay in my room, as the outdoors make me very sick. Just going outside of my room makes me sick, and the kind of low lives outside of my window… I tend to stay in my room, and only go out at night… Its as comfortable as I can get in this nightmare. There is no reason to do anything, I just want to end it, and it will end soon I would imagine… That is all that matters, then I will forget this hell, and it will be as if I was never here in the first place. This is all that matters to me at this point.


I did. It’s your turn, butt-head!


What will happen soon? You will commit suicide? Or suicide commits you?


You tell me genius. You seem to know everything seeing as though you refuse to answer my questions. I don’t even know what the fuck you mean by suicide… Where the fuck do you get these notions from? Suicide is what?


You sure fucking did, didn’t you? I don’t even fucking know you.


Just finished watching some trash on my computer… Makes me wonder what it is I like about trash… I have never once been attracted to myself… When I look at myself in the mirror… I always wonder. What is it I like about myself? Why do I like myself? It is strange isn’t it… I have nothing of value, and yet I cannot resist myself… Like how trash fall in love with each other… They have no redeeming feature, and yet here they are singing in their own filth… Isn’t that marvelous? So here I have my own self, and it is useless, but yet I cling to it as if it is the only thing that matters to me, like I am only like this… Like my life is only like this. I always wonder… Why? But then does a reason really matter? Do I need a reason for anything, and one question… How does one define something that does not exist? I mean what is death really? Sophistry you might think, but then where do we get these words… I mean… Why bother trying to define suicide. I mean that there really is no such thing as death, it is all a pretense that people use to describe something that is lost, but then wouldn’t I technically be dead right now then?


Just finished playing Mass Effect 3… I guess those aliens must be wasabi… Isn’t that funny?


My abilities are next to not very good… Well I mean that I can achieve average results if I try hard, but nothing I do is remarkable brilliant. I can provide myself with about barely enough. I wouldn’t have been so dumb if I was prepared for the rejection online… This nearly destroyed me, and has contributed to endless pressure. I wish I could have reasoned it out, but then I probably would not have had problems if I did. I mean that I have always had enough knowledge to determine similarities, but I am afraid I failed to reason things out properly. I have always found it puzzling, when I find people to be extremely stupid in that they cannot offer even a slightly opinionated response to my musings without flat out contradicting my intentions. This is madness… Without reassurance, my calculation are meaningless, and cannot be cemented without endless experiments. If a person would have only reassured me of my attempts without attacking me, I wouldn’t have suffered this much…


People are no more then sex objects anyways… If I wanted a whore, I would go buy a blow up doll, and fuck that… Better then a real human being… Yuck… Now that is gross… I would never want to screw a human. Or any other animal. Of course I am not fond of dolls anyways… I have my own body. That is all that matters, I do not want another one.


Just another day in the office folks…


See? Nobody gives a damn about your whining. What are you going to do now?


The only thing left to do, at this point, is to focus on things that matter, and limit exposure on things that don’t. It’s not a matter of making a choise, it’s a matter of lack of having a choice.

This is what I keep telling you all along.

Perhaps someday you may even realize that this is also the only solution that you have.


Wasabi do you even know why I post on forums? I know this is a stupid question, but I figured I would ask anyways. I am running on self preservation. Yes I know what you are saying, I am simply confirming it as fact.


I don’t have habits of asking why people post of “public” forums. Why should I?


Do you have to ask? In any case I will take that as a no.


People usually do not take nicely such questions. Therefore I do not ration such habits.

The answer is: No.