Rave about ISFJs


Anyhow, currently my ISFJ cousin is visiting me from Germany, and so far, since he’s been here, he’s 1) fixed the air conditioning on my car 2) fixed the door on my shower 3) built a new bookshelf for me by scratch and 4) fixed something wrong with my bike

Also, we have the same sense of dry humour. This is great, I hope he stays with me more often. Life is so much easier having an ISFJ around to take care of these practical details that I put off until the last possible minute. Anyone else experience this? I heard ISFJ types are typically the most ideal of ENTJs. I’m thinking this might be accurate.


Never can imagine myself with an ISFJ man! life would be hell i guess! i get along better with E types, so ESFJ is still possible, never ISFJ!
ISFJ men are lacking of dominance, the J ( stubborness)+ stupidity is nightmare. Full of tears is even worse!


I think an ENTJ and ISFJ mesh well together provided that both have a good level of maturity and are healthy individuals. Simply put-- they need to have some of their life together to be able to offer each other fruitful parts of their personality.

ISFJs and ENTJs will bring a sense of calmness to one another as if there isn’t a need to over-think the usual things they over-think about everyday, and each one inspires the other to enjoy their own respective worlds. An ENTJ might like S stuff a little more, and an ISFJ will enjoy rationalizing things out a bit more. An ISFJ makes the ENTJ a bit more well-rounded as a person, and vice versa.

In the end, it depends on maturity and being on a certain similar wave-length.


How does the utilitarian Vs cooperator dynamic play out? I would think it might lead to conflict/boredom?


Too much conflict to my experience.
I got a first born ENTJ female friend who married to a last born ESFJ guy. Their relationship is pretty harsh to her opinion.


This made me laugh. I suppose this applies to ESFJs who I find quite pushy.


I think utilitarian/cooperator is based on a type’s reaction to circumstances and events, as they are tools, whereas communication is largely based on abstract/concrete. Hence, wouldn’t an abstract utilitarian (NT personalities) have certain communication clashes with a concrete utilitarian (SP personalities) as well as with cooperators?

In terms of cognitive functions, ISFJs possess what ENTJs don’t prefer at all yet the absence of it may be affecting now and then, hence the presence of it provides relief and perspective.

It goes without saying that despite this, boredom can ensue as well as conflicts. It will definitely feel like nothing is happening for both types respectively and at this point how differently they deal with life and the world will start having an impact negatively. This is because ISFJs and ENTJs have no functions in common:
ISFJ - Si-Fe-Ti-Ne
ENTJ - Te-Ni-Se-Fi

So I’m suspecting that if one forces one’s views on the other is when conflicts will start arising. The different point of views will get annoying for both types.

In the ISFJ-ENTJ dynamics, I guess when things are good, they’re VERY good, but when they’re bad, it can be severely blown out of proportion, however since each other’s dominant function is the other’s non-preferred function, it is welcomed anyway at some point or another. A lot of ENTJs report bad news with regards to xSFJs as it is, so much of anything can really be taken with a grain of salt. It’s after all a speculation/theory, and perhaps in real life where two people cognitively match are likely to get along.






I agree with this it makes quite a bit of sense with my personal experience with ISFJ’s. If an ENTJ is quite matured and takes president in learning more about the perspective and thought processes involved rather than trying to correct the ISFJ and teach them there is no conflict; matured ENTJ’s do not instigate conflict - they are beyond that level of thought as they know there is nothing to be learnt out of conflict so why persue it? An ENTJ will rarely put himself in a position where he hasnt covered all bases; provided back doors and masterminded the whole operation so it is impossible for him to ever be wrong. Some people may say they think 2 steps ahead, ENTJ’s are thinking 100 steps ahead and can patch into any single step and make changes quicker than the other can comprehend the speed at which an ENTJ mind operates. It’s both a gift and a damned curse.

The ISFJ/ENTJ combination in my experience is that it’s so good, so natural; it’s comforting to have someone so strong in what ENTJ’s are typically weak at; being emotional; that it adds a massive sense of security it’s almost like a relief, ‘all I have to do is be understanding and acknowledge her emotions, she’ll do the rest’ - it is that internal voice that lifts a huge burden for an ENTJ who isn’t willing to be emotional. The bad thing - and it’s a big one; these relationships are just boring and ISFJ’s cannot begin to mentally stimulate an ENTJ. And that sucks - I always end up with ISFJ girlfriends, and they always end the same. They say opposites attract and that rings true however in my experience as an ENTJ we aren’t designed to be with any one person; why? because if an ENTJ spends enough time with someone they figure out what they are going to say or do ten steps before it happens. Once that happens; it’s time to move on.


This thread has been a very insightful read for me. Thank you.

I have recently become aware that a young woman I am courting is an ISFJ. She is great in all the ways noted above, except that, similar to some ISFJs, I suspect that she considers sex as a more of dissociated activity than I myself do.

Sexually, it’s a big factor for me that my partner is also aroused. I enjoy sex for my own pleasure as well as for the opportunity to elevate my partner’s pleasure too. I am a very sexual person, but I also recognize that this is not the norm. The woman I referred to above has mentioned in the past that her ex used to like having sex a lot, and that that was annoying. On another occasion I apologized for finishing early :astonished: and the response was no worries, it’s almost preferable. :confused:

So, in my particular experience, I agree that ISFJs are very compassionate and wonderful people. I’d even say that this particular woman has a pretty active Ne, and is certainly intelligent and confident enough to keep me intellectually stimulated. I also like the loyalty of the ISFJ type, it is very honorable and attractive, imo. My only concern is that the odd comment, alluded to above, reminds me of how sex is a dissociated and dutiful activity in the minds of an ISFJ and that sorta trips me out and turns me off…

As an ENTJ I am destined to over analyse this situation :sunglasses: and come to arguably unhealthy pre-emptive decisions, but nevertheless I am curious if other users can shed light on this. Is this a case of an ENTJ zooming in on an imperfection or is this generally an ongoing problem for other ENTJs…?


After looking more into this type interaction yesterday, I have realized that under socionics the ISFJ-ENTJ interaction is actually characterized as one of the 16 “conflict relationships.” The reasoning behind this is that ENTJs use Te-Ni-Se-Fi, and ISFJs use Si-Fe-Ti-Ne—so, not only do the two types have no overlapping functions, regardless of extroversion and introversion we are still left with a logical intuitive vs. an emotive sensor, furthermore ENTJs are primarily concerned with coming to judgements about the world as their primary function is a rational function (Te), whereas ISFJs are primarily concerned with exploring new territories and possibilities as their primary function is a perceptive function (Si).

Note: to those not familiar with socionics notation… In socionics the last letter is lowercase, and in the case of introverts it is switched. So ENTJs in socionics are ENTj, and ISFJs in socionics are ISFp. The reasoning for switching the last letter for introverts is that, as noted above, even though ISFJs interact with the extraverted world using their judgmental function (Fe), because they are introverts their primary function is Si and therefore socionics refers to them as ISFp, even though this represents the exact same functional stacking as ISFJ in myers-briggs.


The last point I will add to all of this is that despite socionics representing the ENTJ-ISFJ interaction as a conflict relationship, I think that given an ENTJ male and an ISFJ woman, under the right conditions it may in-fact be a healthy and suitable match.

Firstly, there is something to be said for having different skill sets. Although ENTJs and ISFJs share zero functions in common, assuming a proper understanding of one-another I can see how they would be a good business-duo. As an example, my parents are INTJ-ESFJ, also considered a conflict relationship under Socionics. They ended up divorcing after a long marriage, and are still on pretty good terms, but were just not a long-term, suitable match. But, they were excellent business partners and have always been very successful in this regard.

Secondly, I think the ISFJ female generally possesses many virtuous traits that are lost on other types, like compassion, loyalty, stability, and thoughtfulness—and, unlike my parents’ INTJ-ESFJ interaction, where the woman’s Fe can very much get on the nerves of the introverted INTJ, I believe that a female ISFJ could be very grounding (in a good way) for the ENTJ male. Thinking back to the movie (and book), The Godfather, I am reminded of the relationship between Vito Corleone and his wife, who was characterized as being a devoted, unquestioning, and loving companion. Of course, Vito’s marriage is the old-school type where the man has his domain, and the woman has hers, but given this structure it seems like a very healthy and secure match.


My mom is a ISFJ and the only person that actually does things for me, makes me feel a little proud considering everyone else makes me feel like a fool. As a result I keep to myself.