What is the hardest part of being an ENTJ?


Saw this topic on another forum and it sparked some interesting responses! What do you guys think?


I’d say lack of intellectual stimulus, but I feel like that is my damn fault haha :think:

Being the only person in a group to understand something… and in your head it’s child’s play. This is especially bad with close friends, when they act like my matter of fact attitude is inappropriate and they give that alienating look.

Trying to fall asleep ALWAYS leads me to rip apart my whole life and changes I’m trying to make.

Personally, I HATE being single for too long, and things like relaxing and being content come far easier when in a good relationship, but I’m also increasingly picky.

When my high standards are misinterpreted and people think it’s about elitism, but really it’s because I believe in people being great… even though I tend toward elitism :wink:

Finally, it’s just hard to deal with other personality types and how they communicate… its like there’s random static coming over my antenna.


Thats so funny. Every year, my college roomates and I have a reunion - its now dwindled to only 2 guys and 1 of the girls - but this last time, the girl roommate told me that I had a ‘reputation’ with her friends at school (which she hadn’t bothered telling me at the time!). I asked what the reputation was for - she said it was for being an elitist!

It took me completely by surprise, because yes, I too believe in people being great, but I don’t think thats smug or elitist at all! Its not exclusionary to me, its inclusionary, because I think anybody who works at it can be great - but yes, apparently that was the label that I was branded with junior year onwards.

So I sympathize with you, and am amused that you actually used that word. :wink:

Also agree with you on the falling asleep thing - though that seems to go in cycles. Just getting out of one of those cycles now. :sunglasses:


Being so independent but still needing people and external stimulation for your brain to function normally.

I wish I was the most introverted, schizoid INTJ ever.


i think it’s being misunderstood most of the time…


I used to be called " Ms gangster" which means " terrify girl" by my close friends in univ. Coz of the way i debated with professors or others / the way i fight for what i consider “right” or when there were some competition. I remember once a girl in another team asked after her presentation :" A, Does anyone have any comment/ question?" but looked straight at me??? ( made me laughed terribly inside), after i said " No", she breathed as if she had just put a load out of her back :mrgreen:

Yes, and also sometimes being called: " you are not woman" ( oh yes, i could say, if i were a man, i could be a much better man than many people who are called " man" here) ( but hey, but dont misinterprete it, im 100% woman with acceptable feminity :sunglasses: )

Why dont you give them a reward? I think it’s sooo correct??? :sunglasses: And i think they should include soem more, such as :" strict old man with his perfectionism" :mrgreen:
1.2.3… Im running now


Impatience! I’ve gotten much better at being patient, but in the past it has gotten me into some hot water!

When a question is asked, I either say I know or I don’t know. If I don’t know, I find out immediately. When it comes to judment questions, I feel like I need to have an answer just as immediately or I will spontaneously combust… These judgment questions usually need more reflection than a swift answer.

Stop, hammer time.


IM: I know what you’re saying, but I think that gets fixed with time. At least, thats whats happened to me and to another ENTJ I know. Its very calming to cross that point, I don’t get frustrated quite as often as I used to. :wink:

lamer: Yeah, you better be running :violence-blades:

I’d say the hardest part of being an ENTJ is being an E but having to deal with occasional loneliness, even in a crowd. Sometimes I feel the US is getting overly ‘S’ over time… or maybe its just my imagination.


I know the feeling. I guess most NTs are like that. And in those times, i asked myself: “ Is there anyone in this world can really understand me?” It’s also somekind of feeling empty, lack of something very important in life but you can not identify it clearly.
There were also moments i felt so emotional and weak, too. As many ENTJs, i had tendency to bury it inside. It’s not good as you will not feel better at all.
I notice one thing: the happier you are with your significant other, the less those moments occur.
I have been through a depression lately. But i’m happy that i’m totally over it and be myself again.


[quote=“Iron Mickie”]
Impatience! I’ve gotten much better at being patient, but in the past it has gotten me into some hot water!

I also had that time, I was unpatient to a point where I stopped talking to some people seriously, because I knew their answers would test my patience to much.

But I’m luckily over that point and found inner balance just like Mango, but it does come back occasionally.
What helped me in reaching this point was to get in contact with my F… to manage to balance my emotions. After all, impatience is just an emotion, too.

And “giving up” helped, too. I simply gave up expecting that people would one day get cleverer and understand how I see the world. Forget it!

My new overall concept is not anylonger to reach something AS FAST AS POSSIBLE (because it is soooo simple everyone should just see, accept and agree), but instead I want to reach my goals in a REASONABLE time with minimum effort. That gives me a lot’s of patience when dealing with a SJ boss for example… he was just one stepp in my career and I kept my eyes open and have a new, great and challenging position.


Oh for me the hardest part is, to get enough intellectual impuls / stimulus / exitaion.
I realize that I start thinking slower, that it takes me longer to understand complex thinks etc… it’s because I get out of practice since I graduated.

But WHEN I get a complexe problem to solve it’s better that sex :wink:


Boy, that’s hard. There are some problems:

  • Need for constant intellectual stimulation.

  • High standards in both efficiency and morals for me and others.

  • Deep, intense feelings and no willingness to show them (to my own good…).

I could go on… but those would be the main ones…


Sometimes i think being an ENTJ female, especially in Asian culture is a curse rather than a gift.


Where you from?




Im from South east asia. Do you have many asian friends? :wink:


Actually I have none so far. The closest would be a very cute girl from “Liberdade” (it means freedom), the Japanese / Chinese colony from São Paulo (Brazilian economic central city). Liberdade is the largest Japanese neighborhood outside of Japan.

She is a nisei, though, not a “real” Asian. ^^


What is real Asian? :wink:
There is a saying :" Eat chinese food, living in Westerner’s house, marry Japanese wife" :mrgreen: . Which means : chinese food is the best, house of westerner is most accomodating, and Japanese girls are the best to marry as they are very faithful and respect their husband. Do you notice this from your Japanese friends?
I think this is already out of date saying :sunglasses:


Someone actually born in Asia.

And yes, my friend is pretty respectful, cute, shy and traditionalist.

Oh, and let me disagree with the saying! I totally love Japanese food! I like Chinese to, but Japanese is the best!


People thinking your a monster for being “ruthless”

When im feeling introverted I can get pretty schizoid. Believe me its unpleasant. Normal human friendliness starts feeling like an intrusion on your personal space lol