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Re: Rave about ISFJs

PostPosted: Thu Apr 09, 2015 11:11 am
by Cyanic
This thread has been a very insightful read for me. Thank you.

I have recently become aware that a young woman I am courting is an ISFJ. She is great in all the ways noted above, except that, similar to some ISFJs, I suspect that she considers sex as a more of dissociated activity than I myself do.

Sexually, it's a big factor for me that my partner is also aroused. I enjoy sex for my own pleasure as well as for the opportunity to elevate my partner's pleasure too. I am a very sexual person, but I also recognize that this is not the norm. The woman I referred to above has mentioned in the past that her ex used to like having sex a lot, and that that was annoying. On another occasion I apologized for finishing early :o and the response was no worries, it's almost preferable. :?

So, in my particular experience, I agree that ISFJs are very compassionate and wonderful people. I'd even say that this particular woman has a pretty active Ne, and is certainly intelligent and confident enough to keep me intellectually stimulated. I also like the loyalty of the ISFJ type, it is very honorable and attractive, imo. My only concern is that the odd comment, alluded to above, reminds me of how sex is a dissociated and dutiful activity in the minds of an ISFJ and that sorta trips me out and turns me off...

As an ENTJ I am destined to over analyse this situation 8-) and come to arguably unhealthy pre-emptive decisions, but nevertheless I am curious if other users can shed light on this. Is this a case of an ENTJ zooming in on an imperfection or is this generally an ongoing problem for other ENTJs...?

Re: Rave about ISFJs

PostPosted: Fri Apr 10, 2015 10:42 am
by Cyanic
After looking more into this type interaction yesterday, I have realized that under socionics the ISFJ-ENTJ interaction is actually characterized as one of the 16 "conflict relationships." The reasoning behind this is that ENTJs use Te-Ni-Se-Fi, and ISFJs use Si-Fe-Ti-Ne—so, not only do the two types have no overlapping functions, regardless of extroversion and introversion we are still left with a logical intuitive vs. an emotive sensor, furthermore ENTJs are primarily concerned with coming to judgements about the world as their primary function is a rational function (Te), whereas ISFJs are primarily concerned with exploring new territories and possibilities as their primary function is a perceptive function (Si).

Note: to those not familiar with socionics notation.... In socionics the last letter is lowercase, and in the case of introverts it is switched. So ENTJs in socionics are ENTj, and ISFJs in socionics are ISFp. The reasoning for switching the last letter for introverts is that, as noted above, even though ISFJs interact with the extraverted world using their judgmental function (Fe), because they are introverts their primary function is Si and therefore socionics refers to them as ISFp, even though this represents the exact same functional stacking as ISFJ in myers-briggs.

Re: Rave about ISFJs

PostPosted: Fri Apr 10, 2015 10:54 am
by Cyanic
The last point I will add to all of this is that despite socionics representing the ENTJ-ISFJ interaction as a conflict relationship, I think that given an ENTJ male and an ISFJ woman, under the right conditions it may in-fact be a healthy and suitable match.

Firstly, there is something to be said for having different skill sets. Although ENTJs and ISFJs share zero functions in common, assuming a proper understanding of one-another I can see how they would be a good business-duo. As an example, my parents are INTJ-ESFJ, also considered a conflict relationship under Socionics. They ended up divorcing after a long marriage, and are still on pretty good terms, but were just not a long-term, suitable match. But, they were excellent business partners and have always been very successful in this regard.

Secondly, I think the ISFJ female generally possesses many virtuous traits that are lost on other types, like compassion, loyalty, stability, and thoughtfulness—and, unlike my parents' INTJ-ESFJ interaction, where the woman's Fe can very much get on the nerves of the introverted INTJ, I believe that a female ISFJ could be very grounding (in a good way) for the ENTJ male. Thinking back to the movie (and book), The Godfather, I am reminded of the relationship between Vito Corleone and his wife, who was characterized as being a devoted, unquestioning, and loving companion. Of course, Vito's marriage is the old-school type where the man has his domain, and the woman has hers, but given this structure it seems like a very healthy and secure match.

Re: Rave about ISFJs

PostPosted: Tue Apr 11, 2017 7:44 pm
by Zeldon
My mom is a ISFJ and the only person that actually does things for me, makes me feel a little proud considering everyone else makes me feel like a fool. As a result I keep to myself.